Counseling Love and Romance Psychology Relationships Sex Therapy

The Key To Getting the Sex You Want

by B. Imei Hsu, BSN-RN, MAC-LMHC, Artist

Can you really learn how to get the sex you want (assuming you have some room for improvement), rather than rely on luck, time, or a miracle? And if you can learn, what can the therapists at Seattle Direct Counseling help you with in your learning process? What is the key to getting the sex you want? I think the key is negotiation, and with that key comes as much danger as there is opportunity. To explore negotiation, I’ve taken on a popular topic that unless you’ve been on a desert island for the past year, you’ve heard something about.

A Little Caveat

If you are in a committed relationship of any kind, getting the sex you want sounds reasonable compared to someone who is not in a committed relationship. It makes sense that at least some part of a committed relationship assumes that there is a sexual connection between the partners. But like everything that seems to have a rosy side, a committed relationship is no guarantee of the best mind-blowing sex you’ve ever had. Even if you had access to an agreeable partner(s) who willingly and frequently offered you sex, it may not be the sex you truly want.  And for those who are not in a committed relationship, perhaps you can quietly admit that just because you find someone to be with does not translate into getting what you want out of a sexual encounter. It’s just not that simple unless you like relying on dumb luck.

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The Rights of Marriage For All

By B. Imei Hsu, BSN-RN, MAC-LMHC, Artist

While Washington State was in the process of creating (and subsequently passing) Referendum 74 allowing same-sex couples to marry in this November’s Washington State elections, I  thought about what both sides of the issue are and will continue to fight over. While I applaud and support my state in granting same-sex couples the right to marry, it’s clear there is so much more to be done! Same-sex couples who marry will still encounter bias and administrative red tape at the federal level as their marriages are not recognized in other parts of the country. With just a brief review of history in the year 1967, we can glimpse at what one remarkable time in history can teach us about learning from the past to better our future. What are the rights of marriage? And how can we move forward to help strengthen families by supplying adequate support and care?


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Preventing the Bonk In Life

Preventing the Bonk in Life
By B. Imei Hsu, BSN-RN, MAC-LMHC, Artist

A professional trainer described a recent race involving a young athlete who ran out of steam just before the finish line. Slated to win, her body went from flight to a sudden near stand-still, while her competitors sprinted past her. Trainers and athletes call this response a bonk, when the athlete experiences a depletion of muscle glycogen or a brain depletion of blood glucose. This usually happens when the athlete either did not eat properly before the race, or in the case of an endurance race, the athlete did not replace the necessary protein-carbohydrate ratio needed to replenish glycogen stores. In this case, the young girl simply stopped running because there was no more “giddy yup” left in her leg muscles. As I’ve been reading about the kind of training and nutrition I will need to comfortably run my first 10K race and begin training for my first half-marathon, I’ve noticed similarities between a mild physical bonk I experienced after running more than 10K, and life experiences and challenges that can set you up for what I’m calling a life bonk. Here are a few ways to look at a bonk and how you may prevent a life bonk.

Watch this video to see runner Jonathan Raymond hitting the bonk just 100 meters from the finish line in the 2009 Canberra Marathon