Mindset Shift

In this New Year 2021, all of us across the globe have had to shift, adapt, and change as the pandemic slammed into large and then small towns across our nation.

And we are not done. As King 5 new‘s Brit Moorer discussed with me on camera where setting intentions fit within the path of a pandemic, I reminded our viewers that we are still in the middle of it. Instead of viewing the arrival of our first COVID-19 vaccine doses in Washington State as a sprint to the finish of this deadly virus, I reminded viewers to consider how riding out this pandemic safely is more akin to running a marathon than a sprint. And we are in the middle of that marathon, not the end.

With a marathon, you need to pace yourself. If you don’t, you hit the Wall and run out of energy to finish the race.

With people hitting “pandemic fatigue,” we are entering one of the most dangerous and deadly of times. Unfortunately, some people feel that nothing more can be done, and changing one’s behavior has little effect.

They are wrong. We have proved that if people follow the guidelines carefully to wear a mask when outside your home, stay socially distant from those who are not a part or your household, limit gatherings and avoid large public ones, and wash hands frequently, we can bend the curve of the pandemic wave and trend numbers of cases, hospitalizations, and deaths down.

We are close to seeing some light in this war against the pandemic, and it takes each one of us to take our social responsibility seriously. Yet to do that requires that each person change their behavior, and it’s this behavior change that has been the hardest part for us to bear. It requires that each person puts aside their individual freedom and rights in order to be a good neighbor.

In the later part of 2020, I rediscovered a song that I hadn’t heard for some time. Yet the lyrics are perfect for 2020, and for entering 2021 in terms of setting a mindset for change.

I’ve included the lyrics, below. May your mindset for change allow you to see the beautiful things amidst a difficult year.

Note: The SDC virtual office will be open again after January 12 2021. Due to a death in the family, office hours will also be changing.


Everything must change,
Nothing stays the same.
Everyone must change
Nothing stays the same.

The young become the old,
Mysteries do unfold.
‘Cause that’s the way of time
Nothing and no one goes unchanged.

There are not many things
In life you can be sure of.

Rain comes from the clouds,
And sun lights up the sky,
And humming birds do fly.

Winter turns to spring.
Wounded heart will heal.
Never much too soon
Everything must change

Rain comes from the clouds,
And sun lights up the sky,
And humming birds do fly.

[George Benson]


Taking Care of Your Mental Health While Traveling

Not every trip away from home is a vacation.

Even when it is a vacation, vacations have its ups and downs, highs and lows. I’ve lost track of how many of my clients, past and present, have mentioned the stress of preparing to get on a plane and be away from home, work, and routine, even though the point of their travel was to relax, unwind, recreate, and connect with their partner and family members.

As we enter the season of the Holiday Triad in America (Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s Day), here are some thoughts on how you can take care of your mental health concerns while traveling.

1. Don’t pitch your routine. If something has been working for you, such as taking medicine at a specific time, regular exercise, avoiding alcohol or sweets, imagine what the stress of travel, whether for business or personal matters, might do to you body and mind. If that morning run needs to get moved to another time of day, that’s fine. Yet your body may grumble at you if you withhold something it has become accustomed to for days or weeks on end. Set a reasonable routine and stick to it.

2. Digital connection, but not all the time. You’re on a beach, watching the sunset while your bare feet rest in the sand. Is this the best time to bury your face in a smartphone, tablet, or computer? Keep in mind your purpose for travel. If it’s business, take care of business in an appropriate environment, and do your best to carve out private, uninterrupted time for you to enjoy the beach, trails, mountains, and ocean without being chained to your work. Your brain will thank you.

3. Rejuvenation, customized to you. Understand what helps you rejuvenate, whatever the purposes of your trip. If a business trip has back-to-back meetings during the day, it might not make sense to squeeze another event that goes late into the night. If you must give some face time at an optional happy hour that actually isn’t optional, come in with a game plan so you won’t walk away hung over, exhausted, and set up for poor night of sleep. Take advantage of hotel spa massages, a relaxing yoga class, nearby walking paths, and quiet time before bed.

4. If your travel time is lengthy, consider scheduling a telemedicine session (also known as online counseling) with your therapist. As long as you are not in a state that has state laws barring online counseling from a therapist across state lines, this may help keep you on track for taking care of your mental health needs during extended travel. If you can’t take advantage of an online session, ask your therapist to give you some structured homework that could help you while you’re on the road.

5. If you are traveling by yourself, schedule in meaningful social time. Dinners by yourself can feel isolating. Try booking a meal somewhere that hosts a community dinner or themed dinner, where diners share conversation while eating an interesting meal. Sign up for an activity you are interested in where you can be in a group of tourists, such as a trail hike, a boat or kayak trip, or a museum tour. When attending a conference, ask others if they’d like to join you for a meal.*

If it’s not possible to meet with others, arrange to talk with friend or loved one over the phone while you are having a meal. Do your best to replicate social stimulation and connection, while diminishing a sense of loneliness or isolation. If a time change makes this scenario unlikely, try taking your meals in a busy restaurant, and opt to eat by the windows to get natural lighting during the day as well as to take in any views.

For those who travel often, the romance and glamour of travel can hide the challenges of the navigating airports, staying in hotels, and trying to get your needs met. You’re certainly not alone if travel increases your experience of depression or anxiety, or a mix of both. Let friends and family know about your struggles, and make these struggles a part of your conversation with your therapist.

As a reminder, the SDC virtual office will be closed Dec. 23 2019 through January 12 2020 for the winter holidays. If you are thinking of starting counseling for the first time with us, this is a great time to get things rolling. I encourage you to get started while it’s fresh on your mind, and to not put off for tomorrow what you can start today.

* Of course, I urge caution for safety reasons.


Mental Health as a Continuum

Mental Health as a Continuum

by Imei Hsu

What might happen if we changed our view of mental illness and mental health from a problem only a few have, to a health concern that each person checks in with each day? Photo by Imei Hsu.

She shuffled slowly inside of the spare hospital room, eyes alert, and a frightened expression on her contorted lips.

“You see them, don’t you? Shut up, just shut up!” she would snap at the empty space to which she pointed and gestured. Before I could answer, she harumphed, turned on her heel, and headed away from me.

I was 20 years old and working as a student nurse on a psychiatric floor of a large hospital outside of Seattle. At the time, I considered my first months working the evening shift at an in-patient psychiatric ward to be the first time I was face-to-face with people who were diagnosed with a mental illness or were suicidal. I thought that what I was seeing was the real face of mental health and mental illness.

Since then, I’ve come to see those experiences differently. While they were real manifestations of mental health crises and psychiatric disorders, they certainly weren’t the only ones.

What it required from me was to expand my understanding of mental health, moving it from a fixed point when someone expresses all the behaviors and thinking that “checks all the DSM boxes” for one disorder or another, but to see mental health and physical health along a continuum.

What Does That Mean, “Mental Health on a Continuum?” 

Rather than asking a person, “Have you ever been diagnosed as, ‘X disorder?'” we look at your mental health on a range and not a point of arrival.

What this means for the average person who does not show psychopathological behavior (a very small percentage of the population, BTW) is that most of us can recognize a little bit of everything within our capacity of expression.

For example, I can have a day, week, or month where I feel truly saddened by the news of the death of a friend. If I act sad because I feel his absence, I can look at this as pathology (medical model) if it goes beyond a certain amount of time, or my reaction to his death begins to follow a pathway of maladaptive dysfunction. Yet I can also look at this as mental health on a continuum — grief over time — and experience the highs and lows of moving on without my friend. 

I  can say, “I feel depressed and sad,” and that can signal to me that I need to take time to care for my mental health. Mental health care, as seen on a continuum, doesn’t even need a particular trigger in order to employ. One would simply tune in and rate from time to time how one was feeling and responding to the day, and adjust accordingly.

What Could That Look Like?

If we diminished our focus on the stigma and stereotypes of mental illness and replaced it with this continuum model around mental health and mental wellness:

  • maybe we wouldn’t wait so long to ask for care
  • maybe we would encourage one another to talk to someone about how we feel
  • maybe we would slow down and take time to get some of our physical and emotional needs met, big or small
  • maybe we would prioritize “being” over “doing”
  • maybe we would spend less time “chilling out” and more time “tuning in” (less Netflix, more quiet walks?)
  • maybe we would feel more confident to talk about rough times and vulnerable thoughts, instead of dressing up our stories to all be “Instagram-worthy”
  • maybe we would honor mental health hygiene, like we respect toothbrushing and handwashing. Neither of these practices guarantee we’ll never get cavities or a cold, but then we don’t berate people for going to a dentist for extracting a rotten tooth or taking an anti-viral if they get a nasty case of the flu. We applaud them. 

My opinion is not to remove the DSM as a means of recognizing and treating psychiatric disorders, but rather to expand and broaden the picture of how we look at mental health as a society.

If you have a body, you will have mental health concerns across a lifetime. There is no escape. Instead of viewing mental health as something only certain people have to deal with, we can introduce mental health early in education as a natural part of life.


My thanks to Dr. Cynthia Li (functional medicine) and author of Brave New Medicine, for sharing her journey with life-altering chronic illness and pain. Her well-written story includes her own discovery of disease and dis-ease as a double-sided arrow, resisting the idea that illness only occurs when symptoms cross the threshhold of “here.”  You can find her book online and in your local bookstore.