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Psychology

We Name What Is Without Tiptoeing

Image by Capri23auto from Pixabay

 

I believe that the challenges that each of us face cannot be addressed unless we name what we see for what it is.

In this short post, I want to speak both personally and professionally about something that affects all of us, not as a political concept, but as a daily reality for many Americans, and as it so happens, for myself and for many of my clients.

I am naming it here, without tiptoeing. Whenever I see, experience, or see another person on the receiving end of racism and racist bullying either in front of my face or in the public sector, I will name what I see.

My promise to you is that I will believe you when you tell me your stories of being on the receiving end of racism and racist bullying. I will also believe you and help you name your own struggles with the racist concepts and bias, no matter where you have lived.

My promise to you is that I will not tiptoe around yours or the stories of other’s treatment at the hands of racist bullies by creating euphemisms, polite explanations, or lessening your emotional distress by calling the perpetrators of racism as simply “racially challenged.” While in public discourse there are opportunities for using more nuanced words to foster open dialogue rather than defensive name calling, in the therapeutic setting, racism and racial bias must to be identified clearly.

You are free to talk about race and the effects of racism on you and your family members, your workplace, your schools, and your communities. You are free to explore past and present scenarios you have traversed in your role in perpetuating generational and systemic racism in order to do something about it. 

Professionally, I do not talk about my political affiliations, yet you are free to talk about yours as they pertain to your care and sense of well being. My commitment is to support you. 

If you have a child that is experiencing racism or racial bullying, this is a crime defined as racial discrimination. You will need to know your state’s laws in order to understand what you can do as a parent to protect your child from racism in their schools and programs.

If you or your child is experiencing racism through Social Media platforms, you may wish to look at how each platform handles complaints, trolls, and bullies. You may wish to talk about how to monitor and limit what your child sees and the access that others have to your child via these platforms.

While racism and racist bullying are not new, what does feel new is the increase in tiptoeing that comes with racist exchanges in public dialogue. Many resist naming it. Much like diagnosing an illness, if you don’t name what is wrong, you can’t treat the problem. If you don’t name the racism that you see, it’s that much more difficult to face how it affects you.

You may ask, “Why wouldn’t I want to name something or someone as ‘racism’ or ‘racist’?” The answers are many.  Perhaps at its most basic truth, you may resist naming something so heinous because of the ramifications that follow. Just like naming abuse, it changes how you interact with the abuser and those who collaborate with the abuser. 

As a mental health counseling service, we do not discriminate because of gender, race or ethnicity, sexual orientation, age, or any other point of physical appearance or means of identity. If your concerns fall within the scope of our licensed practices and treatment experiences, you will be met with warmth, concern, and professional care.  If your concerns do not fall within our scopes of practice or experience, we may be able to refer you to someone else who can be of help.

    By Imei Hsu

    Imei Hsu is a mental health counselor, active retired RN, writer, triathlete and arts promoter in the Seattle area and through online services. With 25+ years in healthcare (17+ years in mental health), Imei has a commitment to helping people discover insight into their health, relationships, and connecting. She is the owner of Seattle Direct Counseling and the blog, a presenter and speaker on a variety of psychological topics, and a positive force on the Internet. Her first book, "Designing Your Practice: An Artist's Approach to Building Your Small Business" is due for publication (2017); she is also launching her personal project, My Allergy Advocate, in late fall 2017. Imei is an Ironman Finisher Mont-Tremblant August 2016; she finished her first ultramarathon on April 23 2017. You can find her running everywhere and eating all the things.

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